...is to live life, simply...

"welcome."

Come closer. Look into my eyes. Slowly.
See how I’ve grown and changed through these 8*teen years.
Look at the things I have achieved and the ones I have destroyed.
Things I’ve started; complete and incomplete.
Those that I’ve loved and those that I’ve loath.
Remove the painted disguise and look at this princess in her lonely world.
Tired of picking up the b r o k e n pieces and to smooth out the creases.
Running. Waiting for someone to find her.
Come in now and read of my world.
But remember.
If you don't understand my silence, you won't understand my words.

Enjoy!

Saturday, December 20, 2003

HEY!!! im so happy today! im like smiling while typing this. haha. well the day didn't exactly start off too well, cos i was just TOO tired to even get off from bed, and i was late. so was pretty draggy in the morning. did some settling of the scripts. then after that since we're only playin in the 2nd half just slacked at the seats area. shai and i had to do a lil emcee thingy. well during the actual dry run i was outside during the 'interval' when the emsembles are going on. so after doin a lil editing of the script i went out and sat with the hc tpters. lol. poor yin tat? he was like sleeping. said he's sick. poor guy. and kaikiat's getting sick soon? eeek. they all look bad. haha. poor thing. kaikiat was saying that i need to crap more? since i can crap very well should crap more..for the script lar. lol.
oh well, then i spotted white hair ? LOL.. so ginny happily started to try and pluck it out? but couldn't? so i was helping.. eventually pulled out wrong one.. balck one instead? poor guy? think his head was hurtin.. and i kinda laughed into his ears? oops!! hahahaaha.. funny funny.. then eventually janice came and pluck em out.. yes more than one.. lol.. ok.. then the next funny thing that happened was the blowing of air?! HAHAHAA.. its like damn funny.. cos kk can like project his air very far? THROUGH his nose mind you!! lol!!! sounds disguting right? but no worries cos only air came out!!haahaha.. but damn strong leh.. i was like trynna hide loh.. then all start to blow air around.. so crappy.. lol!! yar.. rmb ginny sth? bout kk sitting in the canteen drink tea like one ah pei? HHAHAAHA!! omg.. really funny? then his expression like.. dont know what to say..sian diao kinda face.. oh my.. so after that continued with the rehearsal.. then pack up already.. he said he'll help me make it more crappy? lols.. yar..
well beside the band room was gettin the rest of the signatures for the card.. then was talking to siyi about my eye candy!! LOL.. can't help grinning now can i? LOL ... ooooppppsss.. and during the 1st half i not playin what.. WUHAHA.. think you can guess what i was doing? oh dear.. -faints- shall shut up hee.
then guess what!! all of us went to KAP.. met LEng there.. and he treated us to ice cream cones!! so nice rights!! wahhhh i tell you, didnt know leng is SOOO crappy lohs.. can die k? ahhahaha no lar.. so so so funny~ then was sitting with yijia siyi shai.. with the other guys lar.. and Leng.. laugh till stomach ached? and after stop laughing was like SO tired already? ahhaahhaa.. went home.. sleep write xmas cards.. think still got bout er.. five more? not too many lar.. hee.. -smiles- written bout 30+ already i think? so many k! lol..
ok got to know SAT score? 1030 ONLY? haahhaahaha ok its no laughin matter.. totally sucked but im so happy? yar so nothing can get me down.. -big smiles- so practically.. just dont care fer now.. hee.. oh myy.. hahaaha.. -breathes- shall end here for today =)

dreamer ♥ 12:34 AM

Wednesday, December 17, 2003

wow haven't updated in quite a while yeahs? actually i shouldn't spend my time online but oh well, im here anyways. haha. sunday had prayers through the wee hours of the morning. was really tired. but somehow fun, with all my cousins around and stuff. monday i slept till late and went to the temple in the evening. aye, really nothing much yar? nothing important that i remember of. heard that on monday mr leng blew up yet again in band. this time even worse. i went for band on tuesday. and i was no more a vegetarian lol. well, something kinda happened on tuesday. ya see, kaikiat was wonderin if it's ok for kitmun ta play 2nd for just xmas carol.. i mean i wouldn't know till i ask her? so when i asked she did say she didn't mind but man, didn't like her reaction cos i do know something wrong and she seemed to be controlling but hey im not that nosey. but once out of jj she was talking of quitting the concert cos she's received lots of shit since ytd. and i only got to know what happened when rae told me. seemed pretty bad? eeek. siyi told me that leng will talk to km so just wait till the next day. sheesh, was so worried. spent my night talking to someone. lol, it was really cool? yeaps. -nods-
we reached pretty early and was letting everyone write the card. well, not everyone of course. haha. went for sectionals. kaikiat had a new haircut! hahaha.. during combined realised that both adrian and kaikiat went ta cut their hair together? lol. but think kk one's better. during sectionals i went off by myself to practice? yeah cos they were doing 1st half. it got pretty boring later on. kk asked me to take? but i don't want! HAHA! siao lar he, i'm like so not good? yeah besides he's abm what. he should know better. yeaps. i played nothing during the combined? haha. just happily hear them play. tried to read only a little. spent most of my time talking to kaikiat and ginny. it's really funny! lol.then later on kaikiat yin tat and i made a pact? to bully ginny, or something like that? haha. but you know me lar, i say everybody! haha. they keep commenting on my laughter. aiyox. haha. i dont know, just think they're all so funny, they tickle me so easily! hee hee. and my my, kaikiat's solos are like darn good. he sounds so good and plays so well. ya know his xmas carol solo is like the mp3 one? like almost there. haha. awesome! i was dazzled by it lohs. hahahaha. really really. who knows, maybe tmr if i get the chance i might ask him how he does his vibrato.
during english folk song suite, ginny seemed pretty scared? think it's like she doesn't know if she should play the solos or not. haha. oh dear. oh well, im sure she'll do well after some practice. actually, its a pity that im talking more with them only when time's running short? sighs. if only i did earlier? haha. they're really nice people. damn crappy. so during combined, i stayed instead. regina left, which seemed like the wisest thing to do. but hey i have no regrets! spent my time to talk to those peeps. at least they did titanic. haha. i have pretty much acquired some skills, or rather styles of playing. like i've said, the environment affects me a lot. oh gee! feel so happy cos i kinda enjoyed my day? thanks to those people.
feel like i'm like having conflicting emotions. like i don't really hate hc so much. if you see my section, i actually really like them? they're wonderful individuals. and i can't judge the rest cos i don't know them. like adrian isn't all that bad, maybe? haha. don't know lar. but i don't know sometimes when people are like saying stuff against them i follow? is it just a strong influence or something? well i hope so. bt actually i don't really care if i hate them or love them hahaha.. it's good to know you made some great friends in hwa chong and the exchange, personally, did help me. -smiles- somehow wish i had more money? would have gotten something for my section, besides the hershey kisses. hais! and im suppose to be emcee with shai for the first half. this means that we need to do the opening speech? like welcoming everybody. that's soooo eeek.. i have never done anything like that before.. blaahhhh! scary. haha. have no idea what to say. need to look for some information of sorts i guess? maybe. don't know. SHUCKS!! got charmed!!! i`m off!! bye!!!

dreamer ♥ 10:06 PM